trixxiebon

Such a doleful night, my body is drained and my soul is bare. I can go ahead and hit the sack, to drop off all the thoughts I've been having lately but tonight I just feel like letting it loose. I won't say much about what's bothering me - that'd be too many, but I just wish to type incessantly about absolutely nothing, with really depressing music playing through my earphones.

I don't know how to do it. Sometimes I am not even sure what makes me feel like crying every goddamned morning that I wake up to but I feel like eternal melancholy has ripped me of my sanity to carry on. I'm not giving up. I just don't know how much patience I have left in me before I really end up doing something I'll regret.

I have big dreams, none of which I've started on. With this heavy heart of mine, with an iron ball chained to my soul, on my own. I'm waiting for someone, not to take charge of my life, not to guide me out of the deepest darkest hole only I know of, but to creep up on me, grab me by the hand when I least expect it and there, I am out. I'm not saying I want it easy. I'm saying that when I want to go through all of these constant fuck-ups, I want to have an entertaining journey that'll always remind me what I did to get where I'll go.

Me and my fantasies. I believe in them, I don't deserve anyone to tell me what I should or should not have my faith in because I have never looked down on anyone who have had their fair share of unique dreams.

I like my life with risks. I quote:

Take risks: If you win, you will be happy; if you lose, you will be wise. Unknown